The world is designed to ensure that your time is occupied. Much of what you do on a day to day basis is keeping yourself busy. I can speak from my own experience on this fact. When I was young and my mind had a few less cracks in it than it does now I would turn to breaking things, for fun. The physical act of breaking something and the consequences of that act, realized immediately or in a few days time felt great. Although probably not always intentional and probably a sign of larger issues all of this was done as a way to occupy my time. We are all skilled and professional time wasters, how do we overcome this.
1) Start with the things you don’t want to do. There are things we put off because we would rather not. Think of the pile of dishes on your sink, or the counter. Think of the laundry basket or the garage. There is always and will always be the pile of books you meant to read on the shelf or next to your bed waiting for the right time. In all cases you are putting these things off because you dont and wont recognize the immediate benefit of these things. You trap yourself in unfinished projects because the satisfaction of a finished project provides a different emotional reaction, one that permits the start of a new project, very different than having many threads dangling in the air instead of tying one knot before moving onto the next.
2) Say no, there has been nothing more damaging to my social life than saying no. I am sure I have missed countless opportunities to be social, or to become a different person by saying yes to things. However tehere is not much more time that I cherish than being able to reflect on my own abilties, skills and challenges without the added social influence of having other people assess my mistakes on my behalf. Take the time to yourself that you need to grow as a person, you will earn this right at some point because you will eventually be alone. Do no fill your time with things you would rather not do. Say no.
3) Break things. I have a colleague who feels like they are hated, specificially because they are making more work for their superiors with the actions they are taking to make sure that their subordinates are well looked after, in some cases by saving the day at the lowest level has earned them a nasty reputation at the higher eschelons because it is not the way that things are typically done. I can say, break things, be extra ordinary, and make sure that people feel your wake as you appraoch, and pass and after you pass. They will be upset and their worlds may turn, but dont be a dingy, be a massive ship that respects the speed limit when it must but in the open ocean does not, look back.
Your Canadian brother.
Leadership from the front. 